No Loss, No Gain....

So I just finished another 2 day cleanse.
6:30 am...I weighed myself.

I didn't loose anything.
I didn't gain anything.

SIGH.

I started to cry when I went to lay back down in bed. My whole last week ran through my mind. What did I eat that I shouldn't have? Too much sweets? Not enough exercise?
Why can't I loose like these other girls on FB & Instagram who are posting flat belly pics and before/after pics in there bathing suits??
I have ALMOST changed my eating habits and I try to do at least 30 min workout a day. Even if it's just walking in place in my living room (because some days are just hard...).
Why do I have to struggle? Why can't my progress show the same?

I want To scream WHY?!?!

I really don't want the before/after pics. I just want this weight off.  I want my life back. I want to be able to move, have more energy, feel comfortable when someone wants to take my picture...

Today is a new day. I will not let last week worry me. I'm going to try harder... I got this.

Almost 2 months....

It's been almost 2 months since I started my health challenge.
I don't like to call it a "diet" because I'm not really on one. I'm making a lifestyle change. It's TOTALLY different.

To me, I starve when I diet and then I mess up & quit. I try really hard and get NO WHERE.

My health challenge has taught me SOOOO much. I have learned A LOT about myself.

Yes I've been made fun of and you all think I'm crazy when I tell you what I've been doing. BUT I've gotta go through the hard stuff to get where it CAN be easy for me.
And I'm getting there.

One thing I will say.... I have NOT starved myself. Just because I don't eat a meal one day and have a shake or I don't eat on my "cleanse days" .... I've never been hungry. I've never starved myself. I eat snacks.
I'm on an eating schedule.
It works for me.
It COULD work for you too, if you want to try/give it a chance.  But you have to WANT it.

I haven't weighed myself in over a week but I've lost 28 pounds. It may not seem like much to you but for me, since April 24...

I've had maybe 2 headaches*
No lower back pain**
More energy than before
I actually rode my bike for the 1st time in years!
I count calories and totally enjoy/appreciate my chocolate snacks lol
I've met a new friend who supports me and I can text/call her anytime
Some of my clothes are not "so tight" anymore :)
I'm gaining confidence in myself.

*I usually get a headache or migraine at least 1-2x a week...
**I almost ALWAYS wake up with low back pain. No matter how I sleep, it was always an Aleve/Ice my back every morning.

So more on my back pain... I started having more pain the past 2 days. I have been using my "stepper" in the living room and I found a step routine on YouTube I enjoy doing. So with doing that, I am using my muscles more and they aren't used to being used this much so now I'm going through process of building them back up and getting them used to being used...

It sucks trying to loose weight.
And honestly, it totally sucks trying to be healthy lol
Why can't this be easy?